Friday, March 19, 2010

Why Does The Chase Have To End?

I was talking with a friend the other day about ways of men and the things they do that drive women crazy and annoy us to no end. One of the things that was discussed was that we didn’t understand why when men do all this chasing to get a woman’s attention and to win her over and then spoil her with the kind of treatment that is foreign to her and then all of a sudden once they’ve gotten what they wanted (and I’m not talking about sex) they just stop. The attention gets less and less. The pampering and spoiling dwindle down almost to none. Sometimes in the case of some people their sex life even begins to suffer. It’s as if now that they know that they have that particular woman and that she loves them and that in their mind she isn’t going anywhere, they don’t have to continue doing the things that got her to that point. So I guess it leads me to wonder, can a woman ever really allow herself to be caught?

Now I know that there are some men (few and far between) that do continue the things that they started, probably because they realize that what he did to get her the next man can do as well but for a vast majority of men this seems to apply. I have even gotten the advice from some women that they feel that women can never truly let a man know that they’ve got them because then the chase will be over and the man will lose interest. I’ve heard from some men that they do like the chase and that it is true that the chase is the most exciting part of the relationship but doesn’t that pose another problem. If a woman is always running and the man is always chasing doesn’t that mean inevitably we are still playing games and isn’t that the thing that we don’t want in a relationship?

It just seems that chasing shouldn’t be the only thing of interest to the man. They should enjoy that they actually caught the woman that they chased so hard after and the woman should be able to enjoy being caught by the man that flattered her with all the chasing. Just because the chasing ends shouldn’t mean that the things that a man did while chasing her should end. It doesn’t mean that a man’s mentality should all of a sudden be “well I got her so now I can ignore her”. In my opinion that doesn’t show that the man appreciates what it is that he really got. I kind of feel like if I feel the guy I’m dating is slipping in the areas that drew me to him in the first place then I should say something about it and although the man might consider it nagging it still must be said, “This is the way you got me, so this is the way you have to keep me.”

While I know that to some women this is not a big deal. They expect a change within the relationship when it isn’t so new anymore and feel that it is nothing to nag about. While I know that a change does come when a relationship turns from new to not so new and then to just routine, I still do not expect a total decline. I think that men do take us for granted a little bit but I also think that we tend to let them. Why don’t we deserve to be spoiled and pampered for the entire relationship if that’s the way things started off? Why can’t we expect the same amount of attention for the entire time when it started off with huge amounts of attention? I know that for me I am so used to getting the bad treatment that when I got the good treatment it spoiled me and I would like to stay spoiled. I feel like with all I’ve been through that I deserve to be. I feel that all women are worth the eternal chase. To me the chase should never be over.

Jimmetta Carpenter
“The Diary: Succession of Lies” (Release Date To Be Announced)
Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

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