Monday, March 22, 2010

Starving For Love

Love is said to come in all shapes and sizes and in many different forms. So if that’s what people really believe than why is it that every man wants a woman that fits in clothes anywhere between a size 0 to a 10. What makes a woman who wears a size 4 any more attractive than the woman who wears a size 24? And why is it that when a full figured woman does get a decent man either it’s because he wants to take advantage of whatever insecurities she may have or it’s due to insecurities of his own? Why doesn’t the male species see full figured women as being good enough to fit their standards of beauty?

Okay sure there is that category of men who love a full figured woman and it is an honest attraction without any hidden agenda’s but there are far too few men in that category. Society places too much emphasis on the “pretty woman” having the “perfect” shape but is that really fair to make women feel like they’re any less of a woman because they can’t easily step into a size 2. It most likely is the number one reason why we have so many women walking around the world with eating disorders that no one would even think they have because they have the “perfect” image for a woman but maybe the pressure is making them do unnecessary things to maintain a weight that they feel is acceptable by the rest of the world.

It’s almost as if you are not only looked down upon if you’re over a certain size but people begin to look past you and act as if you are not even a human being anymore because you wear a size 16 or above. I constantly overhear people talking about overweight women, laughing and commenting on how they feel that “fat” people should be able to control their eating. I just think to myself if only these narrow minded people understood that it isn’t always that simple. True there are some people that are overweight because they eat entirely too much but the majority of people who are overweight are that way because of many reasons that don’t even involve them overeating. I happen to be a larger sized woman and I barely eat three meals a day let alone stuff myself so much that I am overweight but I have learned to accept who I am and that I will probably always be a little on the heavy side. But it doesn’t make me any less of a beautiful person because I don’t wear a size 4.

In terms of finding a decent man I have always gotten the comments from people like “she’s pretty but if she would loose a little weight I would date her”. It made me sad at first and down right angry but in time I learned to cope with the narrow minds of some men and accept that it’s their own insecurities that make them think that way. But it still makes me wonder what made men think that there was only supposed to be one kind of woman on this earth, that being the women that fall below a size 10, and what makes them think that the women who are of “standard” size are what they’re really looking for.

Society has placed such a high standard of beauty on every woman that it is starting to come at a very high price. It’s as if to be loved women have to be “perfect” in the eyes of the world as well as the man that they’re trying to impress. It shouldn’t be that hard to accept people for who they are no matter what they look like on the outside. Some of the most beautiful women aren’t the ones who have an obvious beauty, but instead they have that ordinary kind-of beauty that doesn’t hit you right away. If you keep looking for something that’s not there, you’re going to miss everything it is that they’re offering. When choosing to be with someone size shouldn’t be a factor and there isn’t any person, man or woman, who should ever have to find themselves in the position where they are “starving for love.”

Jimmetta Carpenter
The Diary: Succession of Lies (Release Date To Be Announced)
Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

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