Thursday, May 6, 2010

Comfortable Enough For You

They say that there is someone out there for everyone. They say that a person doesn’t have to lower their standards or alter their type in order to find that someone. Well after many years of searching for what is within my standards of a mate I am starting to draw the very real conclusion that maybe everything isn’t exactly going to work out quite the way it had been expected to. Unfortunately like many things in life that somehow get off course so can the drama of finding the right man.

It seems like every guy out there just wants to be mistreated. It may seem like I’m exaggerating but in my case and a lot of women that I know it rings true. There are women out there who pride themselves on cheating on men and taking whatever money they can get out of them just for sport and for some reason, unknown to me or any of the other good women out there, men love these women. It’s funny because a lot the men that complain about the mistreatment that they get are the one’s that seek out those particular women and that’s what they choose to hold onto.

As far as love is concerned you can pretty much navigate people into four major types. There are the good girls, the good guys, the bad girls and the bad guys. This is where everything gets unevenly matched up because as it would turn out the good guys like the bad girls, the bad guys like the bad girls and of course that leaves the good girls isolated and off to the side watching as they are yet again the last picked for the team. It never fails and it isn’t fair. A woman who is honest and faithful, not to mention loving and kind is the one that’s likely to be left still looking for love at the age of thirty while the women who cheat lie and steal their way into someone’s bed are the one’s who would’ve been divorced twice and working on the third by the time they reach thirty. It makes me question whether a man really does know a good woman when he sees one.

I hear the word “comfortable” mentioned a lot when it comes to relationships. A woman cheats and their mate stays because they’re “comfortable” staying with them. He may realize that he and his woman are not compatible with each other for whatever reason but he stays because he’s “comfortable”. He finds another woman that he’s more suitable with and he stays with the one he doesn’t want to be with anymore because he’s “comfortable”. A lot of men seem to get accustomed to a certain way of life, whether it’s the life they want or not, and stick with it but I’m beginning to be concerned with the fact that men don’t seem to know when to bow out until far too many people are hurt.

Men seem to have just as bad a judgment with women as women obviously do with men. Now I’m not saying that women don’t have the problem of always being attracted to problematic men and that they don’t fall into a pattern as well. However the difference between the two is that sooner or later women usually know when to say enough is enough. Men get comfortable with being comfortable, even if it is in a bad relationship, and they stay in a situation for years and years making for an ending that is bound to be hurtful and full of drama.

I guess it sounds like I’m being a little one sided here but I am a woman in search of a decent man. It just seems that the men I’m attracted to are all attracted to the women that treat them like, dare I say it, SHIT. I get the brush off’s like you’re a nice girl but you’re not my type or the ever so popular, you’re just too nice for me. Or I just get stuck loving a man who wants to stay in a bad relationship that just keeps getting worse. It just seems like no matter what, everyone is just going to be unevenly matched up. While a lot of women are out there looking for their ideal mate, their ideal mate will still be in a “comfortable relationship” until he decides “comfortable” just isn’t going to be enough.

Jimmetta Carpenter
The Diary: Succession of Lies (Release Date TBA)
Writing as “Jaycee Durant”

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